From Florida Jewish Journal: Caring for aging parents discussed

The Shul's Rabbi Sholom Lipskar recently gave a presentation at a caregiving seminar. (Submitted photo)

Adult children and Jews who have struggled to deal with the obligation in caregiving for elderly adult parents found out about today’s best senior care options and Halakhic principles at a recent seminar, “The Limits of Caring for Aging Parents,” at the Shul of Bal Harbour in Surfside.

The Shul’s Rabbi Sholom Lipskar and Judith Lieber, vice president of Behavior Health for Jewish Community Services of South Florida, provided this information to the audience.

The presentation was the second of a two-part series hosted by JCS, The Shul, and Bais Menachem Chabad in North Miami Beach.

Lieber discussed the benefits of hosting this series to the Jewish community.

“I think that the Jewish community always embodies the value of tikkun olam and so we’re always looking to do more and this series, and a series like it, educates people on how they can take care of themselves and enhance the quality in their own lives and I think that’s a big factor in the Jewish community,” she said.

Lieber mentioned that it’s important to take care of oneself when caregiving.

“It’s important that you take care of yourself as you take care of your parents because we know that caretakers when they’re caring for someone who needs substantial care, studies show that about 50 percent of them suffer from depression plus other stress related syndromes so it’s really important to take care of yourself and to understand that it’s okay to ask for help,” she said.

Lieber also discussed the vital control that caregivers need to give to their parents.

“It’s critically important that you give them as much control as you possibly can so they can have the dignity and the respect whenever and whatever stage they’re at,” she remarked. “It’s very helpful to remember who they are and when they were active in their lives as they start to diminish.”

Lieber urged the audience members that if their parents are not living in the same town and if they’re concerned that maybe they’re starting to diminish then it’s time for them to check out resources and be proactive. She also added that it’s very important early on in the process for them to talk to their parents about what it is they want to have in their life as they start aging.

During his presentation, Lipskar discussed Torah and Talmudic teachings in honoring thy mother and thy father throughout their entire lives. He also remarked that humans, unlike animals, have lifelong connections with parents.

“In animals, no child relationships with parents last for long periods,” he remarked. “Animals need the parents at first but once they become independently able to feed themselves, the relationship doesn’t really exist at all. There’s no connection at all. Humans are connected. There’s no disconnect.”

Copyright © 2011, South Florida Sun-Sentinel

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http://floridajewishjournal.com/news/palm-beach-county-news/fl-jjdc-seminar-0119,0,946516.story

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